moment of grace

March 30th, 2007 |

Although I’m sure there are several people who would be willing to attest to my soup fanaticism (and should this subsequently mean skill?) I have had a very disheartening run lately, of disasters running to the inedible. Yes, sacrelige, I know.

At any rate, to celebrate the first deliciously decent bowl of soup this month (year?!) - I will regale you with instructions.

everything roughly chopped -
half onion in butter+/olive oil
add -
carrot x 2
potato x 2
half a butternut squash
a few spring onions
healthy pinch of smoked paprika
handful of torn basil leaves
cup and a half of red lentils
water, just to cover (more if you insist on thin soup)
salt to taste
bring to a boil
let simmer until all squishily tender
blend
yellow soup happiness. a moment of grace?

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learning to be weary

March 29th, 2007 |

This week has been nothing very profound.
Driving interminable times across town (home-hospital-clinic-random houses of the child-bearing-repeat) I have reached some very trite conclusions:
I really like roundabouts, negotiated with one hand on the steering
I really do not like rooms in houses that are still and quiet because no-one ever goes in there

And I am learning -

What the curve of a spine feels like - curled every which way beneath secretive folds of skin and liquid

That, eventually everyone unfolds the corner of their quietly remarkable self. And if you are there to see it as they breath newly-expanded-love over 3500g of recombinated genes, then you are a priveliged human indeed.

. . . and I’m learning to be weary
because even that,
can,
every so often,
catch you a glimpse of something profound

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Palarrer*

March 22nd, 2007 |

Wednesday brings - 1. . 2. . . 3. . . .
one frantic pre-clinic grocery shop of apricot granola bars and a giant bag of apples on an oddly premonitic whim
one phone message from delivery suite waiting when I arrived 2 minutes late
and then -
two women with two classic (different) presentations of a gestational condition
two obgyn consults
two inductions of labour
two dire predictions of instrumental/surgical births (um, the obgyn obviously)
and 18 long midwifery hours later -
two perfect, pink girls mewing contendly past their mama’s intact, self-stretched perineums.
welcome back to midwifery said the world.
and I said -
many, many, many thanks.
perfection, by the way, is the face - eyes tightly pressed closed - of the slightly-born. . . still lingering for a moment in some other place before sliding completely into the world.
* say with an asian accent

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a little company

March 19th, 2007 |

As fun as it is to make insane decisions to study midwifery 2 million miles away from home (and yes, that is the scientifically accurate distance) it’s always nice to know that other people are like-minded (only not too many, because we wouldn’t want a trend).
Anyway, here is Nicole, testing the first year waters last weekend at our (second - see a trend of weekend school? trends as I said, are not good. . .)Lactation course. I’d like to think I was particularly helpful and persuasive over the last 6 months via phone and e-mail in luring her over here. . . but actually she’s just as passionate about it, all on her own.

In other news, I think I may actually get to unpack my suitcase this week as my flat renovations are finally done and my transient period has come to an end.
Perhaps someone could remind me not to gypsify as a matter of habit. . . I haven’t gotten dressed out a closet since early November, and it all feels a little unsettled.

Me and my nesting habit.

. . . .albeit messy nests where the clothes are never in the closet anyway. . . .

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breasts, needles, becoming

March 10th, 2007 |

. . . and that sums up my week

a day’s seminar up in Wellington (ah, road trips with 5 very confident, very opinionated, very funny women) on acupuncture, homeopathy and osteopathy.

I love the paradigms these alternative healing modalities take. The way they view the body as an amalgam of energies. The way they respect the work that is done in pregnancy, labour, breast-feeding - without making us feel weak or injured.

I’m itching to know everything it seems. . . I want to not only be alternative (lip service?) but to also offer something real, tangible, supportive, empowering. Healing midwifery style. Offering a woman a way to heal herself, through herself.

and then the breast-feeding

All day seminar today with the head of our program (who I wish I could kidnap and permanently install in my brain with her soothing South African accent).

I must ask this question - why do so many breast-feeding (etc) videos depict mothering (and how we get there) in such an inane, dull, drab, passive and frankly ugly way?
It hardly seems a celebration of. . .

life itself

and certainly I know, have seen, and whole-heartedly believe that you can become (and be) a mother with strength, creativity, character

and probably a helpful dose of joyous insanity

heck, even if it’s a maelstrom
at least it’s your maelstrom
And I for one say. . .

we women, should own it.

oh, and breastfeeding is fantastic!
and so is bed time!

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